In your opinion, what is it about summer that influences relationships (either to break up or get involved in a relationship)?
Why do some people choose to have a “summer fling”?
Why do some people choose to leave their existing relationship before or during summer?
After the cold months of winter, most welcome the warm, sunny weather with open arms. However, this is not necessarily all that they welcome with enthusiasm, as most people resolve to change their winter-lifestyle of lying on the couch and eating everything in sight. Exercising and healthy eating habits takes precedence over fatty food and lazy days, which boost our confidence and results in feelings of positivity. When we feel good about ourselves, we tend to feel more adventurous and motivated, which might result in new endeavours on various levels. Some might make the decision to get rid of whatever it is that weighs you down, which can mean the end of an unsatisfying relationship, or the beginning of a new one. The adventure of the unknown may serve to excite our senses, and often people get involved in a summer fling, possibly due to the carefree nature thereof. Towards the end of the year most of us feel the pressure of the stress that we endured during the year, and we tend to welcome the novelty, simplicity and excitement that a new relationship offers.
What should Cosmo readers be aware of before getting into a summer relationship (i.e. his expectations may be different to yours)?
What are the common mistakes to avoid when having a “summer fling” (i.e. getting too attached, cutting off friends and family, etc)
It is very easy to get swept up by the excitement of a summer romance, and this can easily be mistaken for love. It is likely that you are acting somewhat out of character, as the circumstances are different from your real everyday life. Thus, as the stress has been relieved, you tend to feel more carefree and easygoing, though this might change once back in your real life setting. We tend to put our best foot forward when meeting new people, and might be fooled into thinking that it is because of this new person that we are suddenly carefree and relaxed. We might start to believe that we have never felt like this before, and that it is due to this person that we act so differently.
Also, consider that if it is true that you are acting somewhat different than you normally would, the possibility exists that he is doing the same thing, whether consciously or not. Being caught up in a summer fling is (sometimes unfortunately) not real life, and you need to return to reality at some stage. Having cocktails at the pool after a hot day on the beach cannot compare to having to pay bills and deal with traffic after an exhausting day, and it is sometimes very difficult to tell how someone would deal with your reaction to stress. If what you are looking for is uncomplicated fun, then it is a different story all together.
Decide what your expectations are, and think about how far you are willing to go with him in a physical sense. If sex is a possibility, ensure that you are safe and have taken the necessary precautionary steps.
How can Cosmo readers safeguard themselves emotionally during a summer fling while still “letting go” enough to enjoy it?
If you are aware of the fact that the excitement might have an influence on your behaviour as well as his, you are one step ahead to avoid getting your heart broken. Try to keep in mind that having a fling should be exactly that, a fling. If you are looking for a serious relationship, you need to communicate this to the guy who might be under the impression that he is about to have a holiday romance, with the emphasis on holiday. Once your expectations have been voiced, he can decide whether he wants to stick around or not. However, do not think that if he does, he is consenting to a happy ever after, he might just be in it for the fun, regardless of what you had said. This does not mean that you should not say anything in fear of scaring him away, and if you know that you are looking for something serious, he has a right to know too.
And how do you advise Cosmo readers to get deal with it if their boyfriend splits up with them ahead of summer?
A break-up is never pleasant, it does not matter what time of the year it is. If he left you because it is summer, and he is planning to have a fling of his own, then you have to ask yourself whether you want to be with someone who only wants to be with you when no one better is around.
